Having Only Each Other
by AClassyLady
Summary: A quiet evening is suddenly interrupted by a strange vortex appearing in the sky, pulling Ren into it. But a hand catches his own, refusing to let go, getting pulled into the portal as well. Now Ren and Horohoro, the owner of the hand, are on their own---
1. Won't Let You Go

Having Only Each Other  
  
By: Kichara  
  
Chapter One: Won't Let You Go  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
Whelp, here we go! Off to the wonderful world of shounen ai goodness! That's right, this is boys wit' boys, so if you dun like it, go 'way. ;P This story goes out to muh man-whore, Cassie, who was the one that corrupted me into the world of Ren Horohoro goodness. It's all her fault! And that makes me happy… ^^  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
It was one of those great moment's that life gives you. The sun was almost setting, casting long shadows through the playground that Yoh, Manta, and Horohoro had decided, on impulse, to occupy on the way home, dragging Ren into the deserted area with them. He sat now, perched at the top of the monkey bars, observing the other three as they huddled together. And watching one in particular. His stare was quiet and intent, as it always was when there wasn't a chance of anyone seeing him as he watched the snowboarding shaman.   
  
The Chinese boy loved times like this, when he could just watch and he didn't have to worry about anyone noticing. He could be forever content to just see Horohoro's wide grin, watch his eyes light up, hear his warm laugh of sunshine. Anyway, he had to be content with watching, what else could he do? He wondered, his eyes going out of focus as he pondered exactly what it was that he would do if he could.   
  
A hand grabbing at his foot and a cheerful voice broke him out of the thoughts. He looked down in surprise to see Horohoro's bright eyes. "C'mon, we're gonna get a good game of Hide and Seek in before it gets too dark, and it's a lot more fun when you have four people instead of just three!"  
  
Ren forced his usual frown, glaring at the boy below him. "Why should I have to act like an idiot with the rest of you?"  
  
Horohoro's wide grin didn't subside, unaffected by Ren's icy glower. "Because it's better to have four than three, c'mon." And he gave a firm tug at Ren's hanging leg, forcing the boy to slip off the monkey bars and land gracefully next to him.   
  
"Fine, if it'll shut you up." He snapped grumpily, wondering somewhere in his mind what the point of keeping up the front he'd had for so long was. Was it because that had been his true face for so long before, and old habits were hard to break? Or was it simply because he was too much of a coward to show his true feelings? He contemplated scornfully as he ran back to the others with Horohoro. Someone had once said that life was too short. Was he wasting it now by acting like someone he wasn't, and not trying to be someone he didn't even know who he was, as he'd never tried to be them?  
  
"Alright, Yoh, you're it, gotta count to a hundred!" Horohoro demanded as they jogged up.  
  
"One hundred, don't you think that's a bit much?" Yoh protested balefully, placing a hand on his hip. "Forty."  
  
"What?! How the heck do you expect us to get good hiding spots with only forty seconds?! Eighty!"  
  
"Sixty five, and I count slow. Or you can be it." The other boy said simply, smiling in victory as Horohoro shut his mouth before he could start something else.  
  
"Alright, sixty five, but no peeking!" He demanded childishly, setting his hands on his hips and glaring at Yoh sternly.  
  
"Hai, hai, of course." Yoh settled onto the ground, cross-legged, with his elbows on his knees. He set his head in his hands, covering his eyes, and, true to his word, began counting very slowly. "One-----two-----three----" The three other boys scattered, Manta heading off in one direction and Horohoro and Ren in the other.   
  
"Hey, go find you're own hiding place!" Ren snapped as they ran through the trees together.   
  
"Hey, you go! I was heading this way first!"  
  
"Tch, or so you want to think."   
  
"Whatever." Horohoro skidded to a halt, glaring at Ren fully, who stopped in his tracks.  
  
"What, you got a problem?" The other boy snapped, lowering into a defensive position.   
  
"Maybe my damned problem is how you always gotta be such a hardass, no matter what. Can't you just have fun for once?!" The words were becoming quite loud and exasperated.  
  
"Why the hell do you care at all?" The shaman snapped back, inwardly wondering why the hell DID Horohoro care at all?  
  
"Forget it." He turned his back, fists clenched at his sides, to go. "It's not like you'd care to listen anyway." He started walking off.  
  
"Wait, you..." His words faltered and he stopped, eyes widening as he wondered what the hell he'd been about to say. The other boy stopped, half turning around and meeting Ren's eyes, his own wide with surprise.   
  
"Ren?"   
  
And then the world got turned upside down.  
  
A sudden tremor moved the ground under their feet, setting them off balance, and the wind picked up dramatically, whipping their clothes and hair around them. A brilliant light flashed, and both young men's heads turned towards it, eyes searching for the source of all the sudden chaos.   
  
The wind picked up more without any warning, and another tremor, fiercer this time, was enough to set both boys off their feet. Both were airborne for several feet, pushed by the sharp wind, which was growing steadily harsher, before they regained their footing, almost side by side.  
  
"What's going on?!" Horohoro exclaimed over the wind, which whistled shrilly in his ears. He turned to Ren, who was watching the sky in front of them with intense eyes. "Ren?" The shaman turned, looking at where the other's golden eyes were fixed, and saw what held the other's rapt attention.   
  
The sky was darkening unnaturally, while the wind blew harder, forcing Horohoro to set his feet down more firmly. A dark, unnatural purple began to tinge the sky, and it almost seemed to swirl, mixing with a blend of angry violets and blues. It WAS in fact swirling, creating what looked like some kind of vortex. The wind picked up further, suddenly catching Ren under his feet. He tumbled, clutching madly at the grass, trying vainly to grab a hold of anything to hold onto.  
  
"Ren!" Horohoro called out, although his voice was lost in the hurricane force winds they were now facing. Keeping low, he let his feet lose their steady posture, sliding across the grass slipperily. "Ren!!" His voice was heard that time, as Ren's desperate eyes looked straight into his own, his hands gripping great chunks of soil and grass. They were only a few feet apart, and Horohoro reached out his hand, grabbing for Ren's as he let himself slip a bit closer, his body close to the ground.   
  
Ren reached out, sacrificing his clumsy hold on the sod, and caught the outstretched hand, his eyes grateful and saying words that he would never be able to manage. "Ren!" Keeping a solid grip on that hand, Horohoro began lowering his body fully, helping the shaman gain the firm security of the earth below him. But just as the other boy's hand gripped at the ground, pulling himself down towards it, a great gust of wind grabbed the two of them, loosening the foothold of Horohoro's steady boots and sending the two of them flying through, right towards the dark vortex in the sky.  
  
Ren's bright eyes saw it and they widened, looking at the person that was still had his hand in a vice grip. "You idiot! Let go! It wants me, can't you see that! Let go!!!" The iron grip remained, and Horohoro answered loudly through the winds that were wrapped around the two of them.  
  
"What, and let you be alone again?! You've had enough of that, dammit!!" And as Ren's eyes widened, an inaudible gasp leaving his lips, all sight and sound vanished, leaving them only with silence and each other's strong hands. Gone was the roar of the wind, although it seemed to still be pulling them in that deaf darkness. And there was nothing, except for the tight grip of the other's hand that holding onto the their own, held on with a fierceness that was almost frightening.   
  
And then sight and sound returned in a sudden blur, and the two fell to the ground unceremoniously, tumbling and rolling across the hard earth painfully. They eventually lost momentum, the world stopping it's violent frenzy, and the two dared to look around. The sight wasn't very inviting.  
  
All around them the sky was blood red, the ground brown and cracked in dryness. Only black, dead trees broke the scenery surrounding them, jutting out of the ground like gnarled skeletons.  
  
"What?" Horohoro managed to dizzily sit up, and then realized that he was still clutching Ren's hand quite tightly. The other boy, still on his back, winded, realized it as well. His eyes turned to his wrist, with its' hand holding the other boy's tightly. Horohoro let go quickly, seeming to scoot away from the retribution that Ren would issue about it, but none came. Instead Ren's eyes remained fixed on his hand, the fingers bent numbly, wondering about the sudden loss that was grabbing at his chest. A moment ago, all that the world had been was a pair of hands, holding onto the other in desperation. And it had been broken off. He didn't have any words for what he felt.   
  
"Gods...where the heck are we?" Horohoro's eyes seemed to be frightened as he looked up at the unnatural crimson sky.  
  
"I don't know. I don't understand any of this." Ren answered, gaining his composure back.   
  
"Hey, how come you said that that vortex thing only wanted you?" He asked suddenly, confused.  
  
"Because all the air that was being sucked towards it was all in my direction. You were just so close to me that you kept on getting caught up in it. Most of the time, it was all focused on me. Didn't you notice?"  
  
The shaman shook his head, eyes now turned to the ground. "All I saw was how desperate you were, and I guess I wasn't thinking about anything else but how to help you out to notice stuff like that."  
  
The words took Ren aback, and he watched Horohoro's bent figure for a long moment, trying to decipher his words and previous actions fully. Why did he care so much? And now that he thought about it--- "Before, you said that---that you wouldn't leave me alone, that I'd had enough of that. What did you mean?" He asked, his voice low.  
  
"Hey now, I know you've been alone pretty much you're whole life! You don't have to act dumb." His tone softened. "I once talked to Bason about it, he told me how lonely you'd been before you became friends with Yoh. Even your sister wasn't too close to you, and he was so sad about it. He really cares for you, ya know? It's like he idolizes you." He smiled to himself.  
  
"You forgot about yourself." Ren said suddenly, and Horohoro blinked in surprise.  
  
"Huh?"   
  
"You said I was lonely until I became friends with Yoh. There was you too, and Manta. But you---You changed something. When I was around you, I---" He cut off, realizing just how open he was at that exact moment, and how close he was to revealing those quiet places hidden inside himself. He shut his mouth.  
  
"Ren---" Horohoro was a little put off by the other boy stopping, but somewhere in his mind he realized it had to do with the insecurity he held about himself. Ren liked to pretend that it wasn't there, and hid it away carefully from the rest of the world, but Horohoro knew that the vulnerable ness was just hidden very well, and was still very much there. "Thanks." The snowboarder said simply, then stood up, looking around them again. "Man, where are we? And where should we go?"  
  
"You already said that, and as for where we should go, I have no idea. Any direction we set off in looks the exact same as the rest." Ren got to his feet, dusting himself off.  
  
"Well, then let's go this way then." The snowboarder proclaimed, beginning to walk. "It's as good of a way as any."   
  
Ren sighed, not finding any reason to argue, and followed, walking alongside the other boy through the dead and unchanging landscape.   
  
After about five hours of walking, the sky began darken, as if it were nighttime. "Aieeee, we've been walking all day and it still looks the same! And now it's night, what're we supposed to do?!" Horohoro half whined, and then his stomach growled, adding to the noise.  
  
"Quit your whining baka." Ren commanded, stooping down to pick up several sticks along the ground.  
  
"But I'm so hungry! Man, we were just about to get dinner when we got to Yoh's house." He sighed mournfully, rubbing his empty belly sympathetically. "Hey, whatcha doing?" He wondered, watching as the other boy continued to fill his arms full of sticks.   
  
"Getting wood for a fire, dumbass. It's probably going to be completely dark soon, and it's already starting to get cold out. We don't have any food, but we can at least have warmth."  
  
"Oh! Crap, duh!" The blue haired shaman shook his head for not thinking of the same thing, quickly stooping down to gather up wood too.   
  
"Make sure to get plenty. There's no knowing how damned long it's going to be dark, so we'll want to make sure there's plenty of firewood to keep it going."   
  
"Hai, hai." Horohoro nodded in agreement, dumping his armload of wood on the ground next to Ren's, and then hurrying off to get more.   
  
Half an hour later, they'd managed to get a good amount of wood piled up, as the sky continued to rapidly get darker. Horohoro sat on his heels, gathering together two slender branches and he began rapidly rubbing them against each other with practiced hands. Within a minute or so later, he'd caught a small flame and was carefully adding fuel to it, and had a nice little fire going soon enough.  
  
"Not bad." Ren remarked, sitting down next to the other shaman from his place on the ground.  
  
"Thanks, I've had plenty of practice, 'course, since I lived in the wilderness my whole life." He smiled, face turned towards the flames.   
  
"Ah." The golden-eyed boy answered simply, relaxing onto the hard dirt best he could and then looking over at his companion, who was leaning back on his hands, boots stretched out towards the fire.  
  
Dust still clung to the snowboarder's clothes, as he'd never tried to brush it off from earlier when they'd been rolling through the dirt. It was so like him, the way everything was pulled together in one great messy jumble of warmth. The way he wore clothes that kept himself warm, easy to open should it get too hot out, wore whatever he needed to keep his wild hair out of his bright eyes. He didn't care what the rest of the world thought, as long as his own world kept going. Ren thought that he probably envied that of the other boy more than anything else.  
  
Horohoro suddenly turned, probably drawn by the heat of the other's stare, blue eyes meeting gold. "What's wrong?"  
  
Ren snorted, drawing his knees to his chest and wrapping his arms around them, tossing his head in the head direction. "Nothing." He said shortly, gazing out into the darkness, which was so pitch black he couldn't see anything.   
  
A long minute passed, Ren still looking out at what he couldn't see, and then Horo spoke up. "Are you cold?"   
  
"Course not." The shaman grunted, suppressing a sudden shiver as he did so. Stupid tank top wasn't exactly giving him the best cover in the world. Not that he'd let that baka know that. He was invulnerable, he was strong, he was--- A warm piece of fabric was suddenly wrapped around his shoulders.---in utter shock and very warm.  
  
Ren blinked in surprise at the sudden warmth, and he looked down to see Horohoro's shirt clinging to his shoulders. He turned back, just as the other boy sat back down.   
  
Horohoro, seeing that Ren had turned back to him, opened his mouth to speak up against the inevitable argument that was going to come--- But the look on Ren's face stopped him. Lemon yellow eyes wide, jaw dropped gently at ease, he was obviously startled and was making no effort to hide it. Horohoro smiled, his heart warmed by the human expression. "You don't have to pretend, I could see you were shivering."  
  
"But… what about you?" The young man asked selflessly, adding more to Horo's astonishment.   
  
"Ah, I'll be alright. Grew up in northern Japan, remember?" He smiled easily, astonished when Ren smiled back. The two fell silent, sliding into a companionable tranquility.   
  
As Horohoro watched the fire with half-lidded eyes, Ren wrapped his warm shirt around himself tighter, fingers trailing along the hem in thoughtfulness. The other boy was so giving, selfless and sweet, everything that Ren wasn't. It was more reason to envy him, but instead of a bitter jealously, it left the Chinese boy feeling empty. He tugged the shirt around his shoulders a bit tighter, feeling a bit of the emptiness melt away.   
  
Horo's eyelids were becoming heavier and heavier as he sleepily watched the dancing fire, and then he yawned loudly, settling onto his back with his arms pillowing his head. "G'night, Ren." He was answered by a soft grunt, and the boy smiled, staring upwards. But there was nothing, not even stars and the utter blackness of what he was looking up at scared Horohoro. Disturbed, he rolled over to his side, rocks rubbing his skin through his thin undershirt, back turned to Ren and closing his eyes, preferring the darkness of his closed eyes to the nothingness that was surrounding him then.  
  
With Horohoro's back turned to him, Ren took the opportunity to watch him fully, arm propped on his knee, chin tucked in the crook of his elbow. Eventually the other boy's breathing evened out in sleep, and Ren scooted closer. 'I'm becoming a stalker.' He admonished himself with a shake of his head, but decided to ignore the thought for the moment. Horohoro's sleep didn't look all that pleasant, with nothing to protect his skin from the rough ground but his shorts and an undershirt. 'That baka, he didn't have to give me his shirt.' He frowned, irritated. The other boy's body curled in on itself, suddenly shivering and Ren's eyes widened.  
  
"Idiot." He whispered, moving closer. And before he knew it, he was lying on his side next to Horohoro, body tucked against his. The other boy stirred, noticing the warmth, and Ren's eyes widened. 'What am I DOING?'  
  
"Ren?" He muttered. "What're you doin'?" The boy mirrored Ren's thoughts sleepily.  
  
"You're cold." The Chinese boy answered, trying to sound as emotionless as possible.  
  
"Mmm, and you're warm." Horohoro answered, voice sluggish. He wriggled closer to Ren's warmth, till there was no space between them. Content, he fell back asleep instantly, snoring softly.  
  
The feeling of being warm, in more ways than one, downed out any protests that Ren's sleepy mind could come up with, and he closed his eyes, resting his forehead against the back of Horohoro's neck. The emptiness that had consumed his being earlier vanished completely.  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
And there you have it! Thus ends the first chapter of the madness! It can only go on from here! ('Specially since this isn't a short story, it really can't end at one chapter, now can it? ^.~) So tell me whatcha thought, and if your review only states your close mindedness about my coupling and nothing about the content of my actual writing, then I shall laugh at you and throw moldy shroomies at your review.   
  
And laugh some more.  
  
Puppy ciao! 


	2. It Feels Right

Having Only Each Other  
  
Chapter Two: It Feels Right  
  
By: Kichara  
  
*~*~*~*~ Hi Hi! Thanks for all the encouraging reviews, they make me happy. Oh, and in case you've been trying to figure out exactly where this fits into the series, don't try. Since I haven't finished it, I didn't want to give it any particular timeline. So, yeah--- stuff. Oh, and I realize that Ren is a bit OOC, and that makes me all "argh!"-like, but whelp, that's---just how it be. I dunno--- *looks around frantically for something to divert reader's attention and settles for just bashing her head against the wall*  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
How you wake up in the morning can be one of the most crucial points of the day, whether it be good or bad, as it almost immediately sets your mood for the day. And that morning's waking up felt especially wonderful, Horohoro realized foggily as he slowly came to, wondering in the back of his mind why he felt so good. His eyes fluttered open as he came to his senses, and almost immediately he registered the presence of someone in close proximity. Very close. He blinked, looking down to see a pair of arms wrapped around his torso, immediately recognizing the black and gold wristbands on them.  
  
'Ren?' Keeping still, Horohoro carefully looked behind him, seeing Ren out of the corner of his eye. Very, very carefully, Horo shifted, until he'd managed to roll over, Ren's arms still around him, nose-to-nose with the other boy, whose face's peaceful expression jolted an unexpected flutter through the snowboarder's chest. He remained still, eyes fixed on the shaman's sleeping face, vaguely remembering that Ren had lain next to him the night before, proclaiming that Horohoro was cold. 'Crap, I thought it was a dream.' He was having trouble believing that Ren had cared enough about him to get so close. He never got close to ANYONE. 'So why---?' But the other shaman was stirring, cutting off his thoughts, and Horohoro lay still, eyes wide as he waited.  
  
Golden eyes fluttered open slowly, fixing on Horohoro's light blue one's and the two boys blinked simultaneously. Ren blinked again, eyebrow quirking in confusion as he woke up fully. And then sat up straight, arms withdrawing quickly from the other and becoming still at his side. "What--- ?" 'I laid down with him last night.' The memory came as a shock, jarring through him. 'What the hell's wrong with me?! And he--- What does he think? What the hell was I DOING?!' Gods, was he shaking? Ren's bright yellow eyes stared at the cracked ground. Then they carefully rose, meeting Horohoro's, wide and almost fearful as he awaited his reaction.  
  
A gentle smile was his response. "Oi, ohayo." The stress in Ren's shoulders lifted as he sighed softly in relief. Horohoro blinked questionably, then shrugged, clambering to his feet. He reached out a hand to help up the Chinese boy, who took it, climbing to his feet and looking around them.  
  
It had become bright again, although there still was no sun to break the monotony of the red sky. Nor was there anything or anybody to break the monotony of the landscape. "Shit---" Ren began walking, continuing in the same direction that they'd left off in the day before. Horohoro scurried to keep up, walking alongside him.  
  
"Ren, you okay?"  
  
"I'm just getting the feeling that we're screwed, that's all." The Chinese boy muttered, eyes lifted up at the discouraging sky.  
  
Horohoro wasn't sure exactly how to respond to that, so he refrained from answering, trying to worry instead about how many steps he was taking. The two slipped into silence, and Horo took the moment to go over Ren's actions the night before and his lack of response this morning, in his mind. 'Actually, there was a response---' The shaman thought to himself, recalling how he had backed away, almost seeming to shake, and then his bright eyes had seemed so nervous when they'd looked into his own. 'Was he afraid?' Ren had been his friend long enough for Horohoro to know that the Chinese boy was very select about showing his emotions, and the blue-haired young man had a feeling it was because he was insecure about them. But there was still so much to try to figure out---  
  
Like how Ren had held him last night, caring about the fact that he was cold because he'd given him his overshirt. 'Speaking of which---" Ren was still wearing it, and as Horohoro looked over at him, he took in the faraway look in his eyes as the other watched the ground, obvious that he wasn't really seeing it. Ironically, as Horo thought about it and watched the other, Ren's hand lifted, fingers trailing along the off-white fabric absent-mindedly, pinching it between his thumb and forefinger.  
  
His golden eyes opened fully and he suddenly looked over at Horohoro, surprised to see the other boy's eyes on him. Ren stopped mid-step, immediately slipping the shirt off and handing it to him. "Here, thank you." he said shortly, refusing to make eye contact.  
  
Horohoro smiled, shrugging it back on. "Sure, no problem." They began walking again.  
  
The snowboarder lifted his eyes to the dreary sky, deep in thought. He knew that Ren was nervous, and maybe even shy about what had happened the night before. He'd always had issues about showing his feelings, even more so about discussing them, and Horohoro felt no need to push into the subject at the moment. There was always a later.  
  
The next few hours passed uneventfully as the two shamans kept walking, neither saying anything, although the silence wasn't uncomfortable. As Ren looked up at the sky, which stayed the same color, no matter what time it was, he wished he had a watch.  
  
Horohoro passed a hand over his eyes, shading them and slowing down. Ren stopped, turning to look at him. "What's wrong?"  
  
"'M tired. Can we stop for a bit? My head hurts."  
  
"Fine. It's not as if we're making much progress anyway." The Chinese boy added, sitting down on the dust.  
  
Horo stepped over, sitting down cross-legged next to him. He closed his eyes, burying his head in his hands. "Ren?"  
  
"Mm?"  
  
"Why are we here?"  
  
Ren frowned deeply, "I don't know. I've been thinking about it, though. I think that whoever brought us here has some quarrel with me. I don't know who, though, or where it is that they've brought us, if that is the case."  
  
Horohoro sighed deeply, hands still covering his eyes, fingertips lightly massaging his forehead. "I wish that our spirits were here, at least. We would have been able to send out Kororo and Bason to scout out and find something. Man, I'm thirsty." His stomach growled ." And hungry. But I think more thirsty than hungry, it's hard to tell."  
  
Ren's frown deepened as he looked up. "It's starting to get dark again."  
  
"Huh?" His hands dropped from his face, looking up at the sky, which was indeed starting to grow dark, and then he closed his eyes shut quickly, trying to drive away the blinding pain that seared across his temples as the light hit his pupils.  
  
Ren stood up, and the other shaman made to do so, but the Chinese boy's voice stopped him. "No, I'm going to get the things for a fire. You stay still until your head stops hurting."  
  
"Thanks." Horohoro settled his face back against his palms, lowering his head and listening to Ren's soft footsteps as they moved away. Horo sighed, grateful that he didn't have to get up. He sat still, not thinking about anything in particular, relieved as the pain slowly ebbed away. When Ren's soft footfalls returned he was able to look up at him, headache gone.  
  
"Are you alright now?" The other boy asked, looking over him carefully.  
  
Horo managed a smile, nodding and standing up. "Yep, thanks. C'mon, let's get some more firewood." He walked off, stooping down every so often to pick up a dead stick, unaware that Ren was silently watching him. He did so for several long moments, and then he hurried off to get more wood, determined to get enough that it wasn't obvious that he'd delayed in the task.  
  
When Ren came back to dump his armload of wood, Horohoro was kneeling on the ground, already starting the fire. It steadily grew to a nice size and the boy-haired youth sat back, content. Ren sat down next to him, feeling weary.  
  
"It's amazing how something as simple as a fire can make you feel better." The snowboarder commented, eyes fixed on the dancing flames.  
  
Ren looked up, watching the fire intently and he nodded, agreeing. "Maybe it's because it's so bright when it's getting dark out." He commented, wrapping his arms around his knees. His stomach growled loudly and he winced.  
  
"Hungry too, ne?" His companion asked, rubbing his own stomach mournfully. "Damn, there's nothing out here, and I really wish we'd at least find SOMETHING."  
  
Ren nodded, eyebrows coming together in a definite frown. He wished so too, and he also wished that he knew what was going on.  
  
And he wished he could talk to Horohoro more freely. 'So what's stopping you?' A quiet little voice taunted him internally and his frown deepened thoughtfully. What WAS stopping him? Horohoro wouldn't laugh, would he? Ren looked over at the boy, who felt his gaze and turned his head towards Ren, smiling. No, he probably wouldn't---  
  
"Horohoro---"  
  
"Hm?" His expression was open, eyes wide with question.  
  
"Ah, nothing." 'Coward.' The quiet voice berated him and he shook his head. 'I know.' Still, Ren felt the need to talk to the other boy and he groped for some other subject. He was saved from having to do it by Horohoro, although the new subject took him by surprise.  
  
"Ren, do you still feel alone?"  
  
The question, for all its simplicity, left the golden-eyed shaman speechless and he looked at the other incredulously, fumbling for an answer. "At times, yes. But it's not nearly as bad as it was before. I only had Jun, and there was always a certain amount of distance between the two of us. She's a good person, and I love her, but we've never been able to really connect. Not like the way I connect to Yoh and--- you."  
  
Horohoro blinked in surprise. 'Me? Really?"  
  
Ren nodded, a slight blush beginning to stain his pale face as he looked into the fire, refusing to make eye contact.  
  
Horohoro watched Ren's sullen face for a long moment, eyes taking in the light pink that was tracing across his cheeks and an impulse grabbed at him, and next thing he knew, he'd scooted over, wrapping his arms around Ren tightly from behind. Surprisingly, the boy didn't push him away, only turned to look at him over his shoulder. "Horohoro, what're you---"  
  
"I was just thinking--- One time, I was asking Bason about what it was like when you were a kid. And I asked if you ever got any hugs. He just looked away, sad, and then said he could barely remember any times that you had. It's not right, y'know. Everyone needs a hug sometimes. Plus, like my sister says, it's good for both parties." He added with a fond smile, letting go and scooting back to his original spot next to Ren.  
  
"So is that why you--- hugged me just now?"  
  
An easy shrug and a smile answered him. "Y'know, it was like I really wasn't even thinking about it. It was like I just looked up and realized that my arms were around you." His smile was a little sheepish, still entirely genuine.  
  
Ren's eyes remained locked on his for a long moment, and then they turned back to the fire as he answered, words halting and unsure. "That's kind of like last night. It was like--- before I even knew what I was doing, I was next to you, holding you and keeping you warm. It just---" He stopped, mouth moving silently as he tried to put his thoughts into words.  
  
"Felt right?" Horohoro filled in. Ren's bright eyes stared at him, wide with surprise.  
  
"Yes--- exactly like that." He said after a long pause, wondering what this all meant. A sudden gust of wind blew and he shivered, arms sliding up and down his upper arms in an attempt to warm them back up. A wave of exhaustion hit him and he yawned, sliding down to lie on the ground, his back to Horohoro. "Sorry, I'm tired. Good night, Horohoro." He closed his eyes, willing away the coldness that crept into his skin, both from the nippy air and the chilled ground.  
  
The soft sound of rustling fabric and scraping against the dust caught his attention and then a great feeling of pleasant heat passed over him, as a piece of warm fabric was dropped over his torso and then a warm body pressed against him from behind, as Horohoro's strong arms crept around him, gently holding him.  
  
"It's best like this. Now we don't have to worry about being cold." The other boy explained, his grip tightening ever so slightly.  
  
Ren, though utterly surprised, made no protest, his only response being a slight nod of the head. As Horohoro had put it so recently, it just felt--- right. And it seemed like he couldn't remember anytime before in his life when anything had felt quite so right. And with that comforting thought in mind, he soon fell fast asleep.  
  
*~*~*~*~*  
  
Morning came all to soon, and although both boys woke to the other's reassuring presence, the absence of food and water in their bodies was very hard to ignore as they helped each other up, trudging onward to some place that they hoped would have something.  
  
"Damn it's hot. Does it feel hot to you?" Horohoro asked after about twenty minutes of walking along, voice somewhat raspy. He shielded his eyes for a moment, then wiped his brow.  
  
"Maybe. It's hard to tell. Probably because you haven't had anything to drink." Ren answered, his own voice becoming shredded. His vision blurred and he blinked rapidly to clear it. "Shit."  
  
Horohoro's boot caught on a patch of uneven ground and he stumbled, falling over. Almost instantly a strong arm lifted him back up, Ren dragging the snowboarder's arm over his slender shoulders, one of his arms wrapped around Horo's waist, helping him to walk.  
  
"Thanks." He mumbled gratefully, closing his eyes briefly.  
  
Ren grunted in response, fingers gripping the other's torso a bit tighter when he stumbled again. "Come on, Horohoro. We're not going to get anywhere if we don't keep moving."  
  
"Who says we're getting anywhere now?" The shaman's voice cracked and he tried to clear his throat.  
  
The Chinese boy decided against responding, as the tired question mirrored his own worried thoughts. They dragged along in silence for several long minutes before Horohoro broke it.  
  
"Ren, if you could be anyone, or just, I guess, be like anyone, who would it be?"  
  
The unexpected question made Ren stop in surprise. Horo, who was still leaning on him for support, looked at him questionably. The boy's golden eyes had a far-away look, deep in thought.  
  
Ren started to walk again, eyes focused on the dirt at his feet as he gave his unlikely response. "You."  
  
"Huh? Me?" Horohoro's mouth dropped in surprise.  
  
Lemon-colored pupils watched the ground intently as their owner continued. "You can be open and have no problem expressing what you feel." Ren was almost babbling, his voice cracking as he did so. "It's easy to talk to you, and smile with you, and just---be with you. I'm not like that at all."  
  
"I like being with you." Horohoro protested simply, voice soft, and golden eyes turned to him, wide with astonishment.  
  
"Half the time all we do is fight."  
  
The snowboarder smiled, the same warm smile that Ren was so envious of. "Nobody makes fighting fun like you, Ren. Besides, that's only half the time."  
  
The boy looked at Horohoro, a small smile gracing his lips, and his fingers tightened just a little bit.  
  
"Ren, what's Jun like?"  
  
He narrowed his eyes in confusion. "What do mean? You've met her before."  
  
"I know, I know. I mean, what's she like to you?" He pointed out earnestly.  
  
"I--- She's okay. There isn't much else to say then what I said last night. I mean, she's a really nice person, and she's always tried to be a good sister, and---I guess she has. But---we never really had anything connect us, to bring us closer."  
  
"Sorry. I was kind of hoping that she was close to you, and you had somebody to talk to before when you needed. She would have been the only one to get close to you before you met us. Or was there somebody else?"  
  
"No. There wasn't anyone but Bason. But I always kept a certain amount of space between us. I guess I was---afraid to let anyone see to much of me. There wasn't anything good to see, anyway."  
  
Horohoro was quiet for a long time, thinking, and then he smiled. "Well, there's plenty of good to see now, and you've got lots of friends to see it." The arm that was wrapped around Ren's shoulders tightened, giving the other boy a one-arm hug.  
  
"Mm." Ren smiled, reassured by the other's gentle hug and words. "Thanks, Horohoro."  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
Aaaaaand there I stop it, as this chapter is becoming painfully long, and I needed to find somewhere to end it. *sweat drop* It just wouldn't end! Like the energizer story of dooooooom. (Mmm, doom.) 


	3. No Holding Back

Having Only Each Other  
  
By: Kichara  
  
Chapter Three: No Holding Back  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
Jimminy Cheezits, I'm so sorry that this took forever to update! You see, life is out to get me. Yep. *nods solemnly* Between work, costumes, and my sad, sad attempts at a social life, I haven't had the time, nor the equipment to write. And since I'm going to the Bahamas tomorrow, I wanted to get an update on this, although I think that this chapter came out horribly short, which irks me.  
  
BTW, had an awesome time at my summer cons as Ren (although my boss was out to get my Dao Kwan, she broke it twice!), even got to take pics with Cassie as Horohoro with her phallus weapon *GRIN* AND pics with Cary in his awesome Yoh costume with his daughter as Anna, who was absolutely ADORABLE! (I wanted to take her home with me. ^^) If ya wanna see the pics, go here:  
  
Group pic:  
  
Macho Pose!  
  
Wubble how kyoot this came out:  
  
And if anyone cares to look, here's my Cosplay Lab Profile: ^^  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
"S'then I'm all, 'What, no way.', and she's, uh---" Horohoro stopped, blinking rapidly for a minute before turning his eyes to the boy whose arm was around him as they supported each other. "What the hell was I saying?"  
  
"A lot of gibberish, but it's s'all right." Ren slurred, tongue catching in his dry mouth. Both of them had started talking to the point of gibberish, actually, although the prattle was surprisingly a great comfort.  
  
"Oi, thanks." The snowboarder mumbled, his hand gripping at Ren's torso tighter as he leaned close in weariness. Ren stopped, letting him catch his breath. The Chinese boy was a little bit better off than Horohoro. Although he was tired and worn down too, he still had enough strength to keep trudging on, while Horohoro didn't seem to be doing that well. "I hate the heat." The boy hissed, his free hand wiping sweat from his face.  
  
"I know." Ren said gently. The ever-building sense of protectiveness that had started the day before grew a bit more. The boy hadn't even tried to hide it, knowing that it was only the two of them there anyway, and that the other boy seemed to be comforted by it. Horohoro rested his aching head against Ren's shoulder wearily and the other boy's gentle hands combed through the messy spikes soothingly.  
  
A long moment passed like that before Horohoro finally opened his eyes, lifting his head back up slowly, and they trudged onwards. "Y'know what, Ren?"  
  
"Eh." Ren grunted in response.  
  
"I was thinking to myself before about how I wanted to ask you something about you, but I told myself that I didn't have to ask you then, that there was always a later to do it. And now, as I think about it, I gotta wonder--- what if there isn't a later, Ren?! What if we die out here?! And then I'll never have had the chance to talk to you about how you feel, and you'll have never had the chance to tell me---" His breath hitched in his throat, becoming a sob and he slumped to his knees in defeat.  
  
"Hey!" Ren grabbed him before he hit the ground, lowering him there. Horohoro began to cry, head nestled against Ren's chest while the other boy held him, hands smoothing through his hair again, his own eyes closed in fatigue. Horohoro had reached the point of both physical and mental exhaustion, a state that Ren was probably only a step from himself. He sighed, holding Horohoro closer as his body was racked with quiet sobs and said nothing, knowing that it would probably only embarrass the boy later on and that his presence alone was all that was needed right then.  
  
They stayed like that for a long time, until Horohoro stopped crying and just found comfort in the other's company, eyes closed and resting his head against Ren's strong chest. Ren's hand was still in his hair, pushing it back, the other at his back and holding him close. "Guess I must seem pretty pathetic, huh?" He muttered, eyes still closed.  
  
Ren's eyes opened, but he didn't move. "No, you just seem pretty human, that's all."  
  
"Ah, thanks." He had no will to move at that moment and so he stayed still, as did Ren.  
  
However, a sudden prickling at the back of his neck passed through him like a jolt and his eyes shot open as he sat up immediately, looking around. Ren was the same, body tense and eyes alert as he scanned the unforgiving landscape for whatever had triggered that particular feeling, which had been far from pleasant.  
  
"Did you feel that?" Horohoro managed to get to his feet, lowered to a defensive position as he looked around.  
  
"Hai." Ren stood, back to back with the other boy.  
  
The ground began to shake, sky darkening, instantly becoming the same scene that the boys had faced in the park a few days before. "Ren!" Horohoro turned to stand at Ren's side.  
  
"Hai, I know." Ren's eyes were narrowed as he looked at the sky in front of them. Was there someone there, mixed in with the swirling clouds? The wind was picking up now, and he braced his feet against the ground, keeping his steady stance.  
  
"Tao---" A voice thundered over the howling winds. Both boys froze, eyes wide. The voice boomed again, malice laced through it. "You will be punished for the sins of the Tao family." Thunder crashed, the wind picking up further.  
  
"Shit, I knew it." Something struck Ren, a rock hurtled through the air by the wind and he hissed in pain as it left a gash in his arm. It was laughing now, that voice, and the wind blew harder. 'We're going to die here, aren't we?'  
  
"I was thinking to myself before about how I wanted to ask you something about you, but I told myself that I didn't have to ask you then, that there was always a later to do it. And now, as I think about it, I gotta wonder--- what if there isn't a later, Ren?! What if we die out here?! And then I'll never have had the chance to talk to you about how you feel, and you'll have never had the chance to tell me---"  
  
Unbidden, Horohoro's words returned to Ren's mind as the sky continued to darken, the wind bitter. 'What if there isn't a later?'  
  
"Never have had the chance to tell him, never have had the chance to show him--- how I feel.' As the thoughts danced through his mind, Ren's hands reached for Horohoro, grabbing a hold of his arms and bringing him close. The other boy's mouth dropped, hair whipping around his face and half- obscuring the surprise in his eyes. 'Never get the chance--- if we're to die now, will I regret that I never---" Ren's lips mashed against Horohoro's desperately, not caring what happened, not caring about the rejection that he'd always feared, not caring about it all for once. He only cared that they were going to die there, and that he'd never taken the chance---  
  
The world went black.  
  
*~*~*~*~  
  
Huzzah for physical contact. Oh, and speaking of which, yes, I shall be making this into a LEMON *waits to continue while fangirls scream in happiness*. I've noticed a vast shortage of RenHoro (and HoroRen, for that matter) lemons, which makes me sad, and of course, the idea of Ren and Horohoro boinking like bunnies makes me happy, so I am more than happy to write one.  
  
And hopefully that bit of news will excuse this sorry piece of crap that's supposed to be a chapter, which I fully apologize for. I'm hoping for inspiration once I go to the Bahamans so I can get back to my poor, neglected writing.  
  
Oh, and I'll hopefully have a webpage up soon, which'll have my art on it (including my HoroRen stuff ^^), so that shall be good. Yup. 


End file.
